The Hasty Series | Trained, Bold, & Without Mercy

Welcome to the Hasty Series!  This series is an every-now-and-then blog post delivering a quick "fuck you" to something that I don't like.  There's no schedule for these installments; I just write these when I'm too lazy to write a more substantial blog post! 

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Their talent is born to them; their tenacity is uncompromising.

Without fear, they pursue their target; they maneuver with precision and righteous rigor.

They are seemingly everywhere at once, yet nowhere when a threat challenges their trajectory.

They cannot be defeated.

They cannot be negotiated with.

Then know nothing of surrender.

From where they come, nobody really knows.

What do they want?

They want to feast.

Those mutha-fuckin' early spring gnats are just fuckin' assholes.

I wait all goddamn winter to get outside; smell the newness of spring and absorb the sweet sunshine whilst seated upon a freshly trimmed lawn.

Then, these little black demons of the natural world somehow dodge, duck, and out-maneuver my flailing limbs as I attempt to knock the twat-of-the-bug-world out of the sky.

I never do hit any of them - at least from what I can tell. Instead, they remain circling around my head like duche bags, hell bent on delivering a bite that sends me running for the safety of the indoors.

The early spring gnat is just a piece of shit. I hate them. Like really. They suck on so many levels. At least when it comes to mosquitoes, those derpy fucks just float around - super easy to smack out of the sky or crush against your forearm. Not the gnat. Little cock suckers...