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Eat a dick.  My name is Beilthfsnuse Ciltsihek - but you can call me Billie - and I am the Editor-In-Chief of this stupid fucking blog.  I was hired by our founder and CEO - Mr. Rose - after a chance meeting in Munich.  He bumped into me on the street.  I cursed at him - in my native German - and he responded with a very loud "go fuck yourself kraut," and then threw a pigeon at me.  After I learned he was a Yankee, I told him in the nicest english, "your hat is stupid and so is your face."  We both smiled and here I am today.  Complaining about everything and getting paid for it! 

My fucking life.

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A Note About the Content of Hatchet Primrose Worldwide, LLC:

With the exception of the Meet the Team photos, all the content of this website was/is created by one, real-life human being; the only use of Artificial Intelligence was the creation of the Meet the Team photos, which is actually based on a photo of this same real-life human being. But if you know the real-life person behind this enterprise, then you'd probably agree that Johnny Michael Rose is most like him.  Oh, one more thing: the turtle is real - he's a rescue. Oh, one more thing again: our merch/swag is real too.  Buy it.

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